The Common Misconceptions of Greek Life

Stereotype - noun - a widely held but fixed and oversimplified image of idea of a particular type of person or thing 

When I think of the word "stereotype" naturally my mind drifts to the many times I've watched movies like "The House Bunny" or "Legally Blonde" or the time I reluctantly watched the television show on TLC called "Sorority Girls". All of these portray sororities and Greek life in general as an understated group of people with shallow morals. The media even does a fine job of shining a negative light on Greek life, capturing only the bad and rarely the good. 

Being Greek myself and coming from a Greek family, I thought it would be unfair for me to preach about the common misconceptions I hear regularly. So, to make sure the common misconceptions were in fact authentic, I took it upon myself while writing this blog post to get an outside perspective on how non-Greeks view Greek life and here is what I found.

1. "Everything Greeks do revolves around partying in their house and getting drunk" - False. Each chapter of each Fraternity or Sorority has a national board overseeing their activity and regularly sending regional representatives to chapters do to check-ups. Granted we're in college and college students like to let loose on occasion but to say that Greeks only care about partying and getting drunk is like saying the football team only cares about pumping iron and getting jacked. There's much, much more to Greek organizations than what meets the eye.

2. "Greeks haze their new members" - Speaking from a sorority affiliated with NPC (National Panhellenic Conference) there are strict guidelines to determine what is considered "hazing" and what is not with the safety and well being of new members constantly in mind. If a chapter neglects to follow those rules and regulations the appropriate actions will be taken, including fines, the chapter being suspended, having their charter revoked, and even termination of the chapter as a whole. Additionally, why would you want to be a part of something that made you feel as though you are less amazing than you already are? The purpose of Greek life is to build you up, not break you down. 

Delta Zeta sisters showing their bid day t-shirts

3. "They are all the same" - Absolutely not. Each chapter is so incredibly unique because each chapter is made up of different girls. The only things that remain consistent from chapter to chapter is the respective values and traditions each individual sorority upholds. Yes, some sororities and chapters wear matching outfits during recruitment season or during a special time of year but the sole purpose of that is to be identified as unit, a group, a sorority - not because we are all identical clones of one another.

Alpha Omicron Pi sisters and campus rep KateLynn Dotson

4. "Daddy must pay for everything" - First, I would like to speak from my own experience - I have worked full or close to full time throughout my entire college career which, at this point, is going on 5 years. I have always been an extremely independent person and I would never rely on my parents to support my extra curricular activities or anything else in my life, I'm 22 years old. With that being said, I know hundreds of sorority women and fraternity gentlemen who are also working their way through college to pay for not only their chapter dues but their basic needs as well. 

5. "You pay for your friends" - I hear this one the most and it was no shock to me that I heard it again when asking non-Greeks how they feel about Greek life. Let me lay this out for you, any Greek organization is exactly that, an organization. You have to pay a membership fee for a variety of organizations so does that mean you're paying for your friends in organizations such as the environment club or colleges against cancer? No. Each chapter has a set amount of dues, a portion stays local to support the chapter and a portion goes to their national board to support their efforts. If your chapter has a house, there are house dues to pay as well for regular house maintenance. When I paid my first set of dues I didn't automatically have 100 new best friends. Friendships, like everything in life, take time and effort. It takes time to form those deep connections and no amount of money could ever "pay" for that. 

Kappa Tau Epsilon sisters, Olivia, Nicole, and Kaitlyn (me!) - bonding at a formal event

6. "You will never get a "real world" job being in a Greek organization" - This misconception really threw me for a loop because being Greek has taught me so much more about myself than I could have ever imagined. I've learned and polished my time management skills, social skills, speaking skills, marketing skills, conflict resolving skills, team building skills, team work skills, and the list could go on. My point is that being Greek has given me and many others the opportunity throughout college to work together for a common goal. Isn't that what the "real world" is all about? In my personal opinion, being Greek has been more beneficial for me than anything else I've done in my life thus far. By the time I graduate I will have almost 4 years of "real world" experience working in my career field and about the same being involved in Greek life serving on different boards and committees - the two paired together sound like a dynamic duo if you ask me. 

Greek Statistics

7. "Greeks don't care about their grades" - Each chapter sets a GPA minimum that each member must at least maintain to remain active in their chapter. In addition, each chapter sets a minimum amount of study hours that must be completed each semester. Greeks are serious about their grades and it shows as statistics have proven that individuals in Greek life have, on average, .15 grade point markings higher than those who are not affiliated with Greek life.

8. "Greeks have no respect for their universities or community" - Each chapter sets a minimum amount of philanthropy hours that must be completed each semester in order to maintain active membership. Those philanthropic endeavors can be completed either on campus, in the community, or on a regional level. We strive to give back to what surrounds us as much as possible.

Kappa Tau Epsilon sisters participating in Tau Kappa Epsilon's Zombie Run For Reagan Philanthropy Event

Campus rep Brooke Benson and her littles at Leigh Valley's Kidney Walk

Panhellenic Women from Central Michigan University volunteering at a mobile food pantry - featuring one of our campus reps, Lucie Sertich

9. " Greeks live and breath by Total Frat Move (TFM) and Total Sorority Move (TSM)" - Both websites are intended for fun and fun only. What is stated on those websites are by no means what each person in Greek life lives by. 

10. "Greeks act like they love each other but really they all hate each other" - I can't speak for everyone at every university but I'll speak for the Greeks at my university. My university has a small Greek population with three IFC Fraternities and three NPC Sororities making us a very tight knit bunch. I'll share a short, tragic story from this past year to hopefully give you a better idea of just how close we all are. Within a matter of two weeks a Tau Kappa Epsilon alumni passed away and a brother of Phi Kappa Tau lost his battle with cancer. This hit our community hard, not because we all knew the individuals or because we were very close with either of the gentlemen but because they're part of our Greek family. I've never been more proud to say I belong to a group of people than I was in that moment when we all came together to support and help those suffering the most from the losses. The best way that I could possibly explain it is we're like literal brothers and sisters, we may have disagreements and not see eye to eye but at the end of the day we're always there for each other. 

Saginaw Valley State University Greek Life Fall 2013

The point I'm attempting to make is that being involved with Greek life is much more than what it's "cracked" up to be. This goes back to how the media portrays Greek life because from an outside perspective, that is really all you see. Do a lot of girls and guys in Greek organizations fit the "stereotype", sure but a lot of girls and guys who are NOT in Greek life also fit the "stereotype". Not every chapter is a cookie cutter and not every organization is 100% perfect, nothing in life ever is. Along with all the decorated paddles, the mixers, and the formals there is hard work, dedication, and integrity that goes in to being Greek. If you're considering going Greek I strongly encourage it because I can promise it will be one of the most rewarding things you ever do in life. If you're not, I hope this post helped to debunk some of the common misconceptions associated with Greek life.

XOX & LP,
Kaitlyn

Sorority Girl Dorm Packing List

No amount of Bed, Bath and Beyond dorm checklists could prepare me for the craziness that is dorm room shopping... especially as a sorority girl. I think it is a given that sorority girls can craft (or in my case, attempt to craft), so it is assumed that we all have cute rooms. I wish that were true for me. Nevertheless, there are a few things that we as Greek women (or future Greek women) could really use in our rooms to help tackle our daily tasks and make it feel more like a home. Some of these essentials being:

Monogram letters. Monogram letters are the perfect addition to any dorm room! You can order them online through Etsy in a variety of sizes. All you have to do is order the wood and paint to match your color scheme. They're easy to buy, easy to paint can spice up the look of your room. If you're looking for a more squared style, you can also get a variety of letters from any local craft store.

A crafting box. Fill it with paints, paintbrushes, and of course ModPodge. A crafting box is perfect for when you are making things for Big/Little, Big appreciation week, or just a random gift for a sister! It's also a great way to keep things organized and optimize space in a small area. You can purchase a carrier (like this one from Michael's) or just use a Rubbermaid container.

Shower shoes. These are a must if you're unlucky enough to have a community bathroom. Invest in a pair that is nice and durable. My favorites are from J. Crew, but Old Navy and Walmart always have reliable flip flops. This route is nice because, since you're not spending much, you can throw them out and get a new pair every few months.

Dorm bedding. This is a must since most dorm beds are shaped differently than most mattresses and require special sizing. Luckily, there are tons of places that have XL twin comforter sets that come with a pillow case, sheets, and comforter. Some of these places including Pbteen.com, Target, and Walmart! They are affordable and are specially made to fit the XL mattresses that are in most dorms.

A planner. Many would say a Lilly Planner would be the "sorority girl" thing to own, but there are many options out there that have great detailing and plenty of space for all of your notes. My favorite planner is by PlumPaperDesign on Etsy! If you can't tell, I buy practically everything online. My favorite planner design is pictured below, and you can even personalize the colors and name featured on it. It is perfect for the busy life of a sorority girl and has plenty of room to write everyday activities in.

Decor, decor, decor. Besides the monogram letters, you're going to want to personalize your dorm room. Whether it be picture frame collages, lights, a string with clothespins to hang pictures on, and more. There's so many different things you can add to your room to make it your own. My favorite thing that I put up in my dorm last year is my picture frame collage. When you're homesick and missing your friends, they'll always be there! It's a great place to show off your memories. 

Trash cans. These are easily overlooked and forgotten. Where else are you going to put your trash? I found the image below online and it comes complete with a DIY guide on how to decorate your own designer trashcan (to view the guide click here!). You can buy one super cheap and customize it to your liking!

I have learned along the way what is worth it to bring to college and what's not and I love hearing other people's college dorm packing lists! I hope this helped a bit in your adventure to college. Let us know what  your must-haves for your dorm are!

LILP & XOXi,

Kelsey

Health and Fitness

Our girl Elle said it best

A Food Journal:

It may seem like a far fetched idea, or something that will take up way to much time, but it's not! I just went to Target and picked up a really cute small journal. Inside on each page I have written the date, calories, carbs, protein, fat, and sugar at the top. Now here's the hardest part: write down everything you eat. Everything. This isn't to say you need to have X amount of calorie intake a day, it's just to keep you aware of what you're putting into your body. The first day I did this I nearly cried at the end of the day. I was eating and drinking so much I swear I could have fed an army.

Measure Your Food:

I know it doesn't sound like fun, but it really will help. Serving sizes tend to be a lot smaller than the actual amount we eat and that's a problem. If you measure your food, not only will it be easier to log, but it will also continue to keep you aware of what, and how much is really being consumed.

Don't Be Cardio-Exclusive:

I am so tired of seeing girls in the gym spending hours upon hours on cardio machines. Yes, cardio is great for you and you should do at least 30 minutes a few times a week, but cardio alone is not going to make you lose dress sizes quickly. Think about adding in two to three strength training sessions a week. It's a proven fact that you will lose inches faster through strength training than cardio alone. This is because strength training promotes muscle growth and muscle burns more calories than fat. So, grab some dumbbells and get to stepping!

Don't Over Exert Yourself:

The biggest concern when starting a new weight loss program is going too hard, too fast. I remember when I first started running cross country in high school, my first day I tried to keep up with my friends. Those friends had been running for years and did races on the regular, none the less. My advice is to slow your roll at first. You only have to focus on yourself and what your body can handle. If that means starting from the bottom, so what?! You have to start somewhere and, lets be real, at least you're doing something. 

Also, don't forget to stretch. Not only is it important to keep your muscles flexible so they can recuperate faster, it will also give you a leg up in yoga and other trendy exercise routines.

Be Realistic:

If you're trying to lose weight you need to remember that you didn't gain that weight in a day, so you won't loose it in a day either. Give your body time to adjust to the changes you're making and keep in mind that you are perfect the way you are. Love yourself. If you do it will be easier to do this for yourself. The realistic weight loss is 1-2 pounds a week. Remember that. The same goes for if you're just trying to be healthier. Any result takes time, so be patient and keep pushing.

Now go eat a celery stick!

XOXO

-Ashely Wewers 

Nothin' Sweeter Than Georgia Peaches: My Big/Little Story

Running home to Bralin aka the best Big
in all Xi land

My Big and I have a very unique relationship bonded by something very close to our hearts. Our home. Not just our "home away from home", Alpha Xi Delta, but our home state of Georgia. Bralin and I both shared similar stories so naturally, when we met on Preference Night during Fall Recruitment at the University of Central Florida in 2013, the fact that we were both from Georgia came up. I immediately felt a connection with her because not only was she from Georgia, but she also came to UCF from out of state to a completely different world. She had experienced everything I was currently experiencing: homesickness, being away from friends and family, and just the general lonely feeling. I could really connect with her, and hearing her slight southern twang made me feel at home.

That night after Preference Rounds, I had no hesitation when writing Alpha Xi Delta as my #1 choice and I was completely sure that the next day I would be running home to them, and I did. After all the chaotic Bid Day activities died down, we went inside the house to Bralin's room. A huge group of us went back and we got our special Bid Day bags with tons of goodies and Bralin gave me something special... I had no idea what it was when I saw the grocery bag. I looked inside and saw a peach. A Georgia Peach. I wanted to cry; it was such a simple gesture and she had no idea how much it meant to me. 

I was completely and utterly ecstatic with everything that was going on. Being a new member was one of the best times of my collegiate career (NMs- don't take it for granted!), but one of the weeks - Big/Little week - will always be a strong memory. The week leading up to Big/Little week all of the New Members went on "dates" with sisters who were potentially taking a Little. Unfortunately, Bralin and I were never paired up, but my choice never wavered. When the time came to create our Big/Little lists, Bralin was #1.

Bralin gets her paddle!

That night after our lists were made, the Bigs and Littles were paired and all Littles were surprised with treats the same exact night! I was in no way prepared for everything that was going to happen during that week! Bralin gave me all sorts of clues and treats throughout the week to make me think that she wasn't my Big. She gave me clues like "I grew up in Florida", "Curly hair runs in my family", and other things that didn't seem like Bralin at all! All week I was freaking out because I thought that on Friday when we ran home and found our Bigs, I wouldn't find Bralin.

The day of Big/Little Reveal, I went to a grocery store and got a fresh peach, just in case Bralin WAS my Big. I knew if she was, it would mean just as much to her as it did when she gave it to me.
After all the searching on that Friday, I finally ran home into my Big's arms... Bralin! You can see the video here:
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10201120670672034&l=7597589781169387337.

I gave her the peach and ever since then it's sort of been our thing. My Big's paddle was even in the shape of a peach!

Big, Twin, and Sibling

Big/Little Reveal

Our relationship has definitely grown throughout the past year and I can't wait to see it blossom even more. My entire lineage is so amazing and are all inspirational women; I love every single one of them more than they know! I know that whenever there is a problem, something is bothering me or I just need someone to go grab Sunday brunch with, I can count on any of these ladies. It's not just four years, it's for life! TFJ, XiLAM, and all that jazz <3=

Summer Fashion Part 2

Each season new trends appear and, this summer, I've seen quite a few pieces on the trend train. Some clothing trends may only be around for a few weeks, but others last months or even years (I'm looking at you 1970s extreme flared bell bottom jeans). I spend most of my free time browsing Pinterest, looking at fashionistas' closets on Instagram (check out SarahBell93x), and online shopping for clothes I truly need but because “I’ll wear it one day with that one thing”. My personal style ranges from sophisticated/casual prep to leggings and a t-shirt, but I’m always on the lookout for new pieces that will push me out of my comfort zone and ultimately to add them to my overwhelming closet.

Here’s my list of must-haves (or at least must tries) for Summer 2014:

Parachute/Linen Pants

Best paired with a relaxed crop top for a comfy, yet put together look or a tight fitting tank/tee

Skater Skirts 

Best paired with a crop top or a light weight tank top

Crop Tops

 Best paired with maxi skirts, high-waist bottoms, or a lightweight cardigan/kimono

High Neck Tanks

Best paired with skinny jeans or cuffed shorts 

*try it tucked in for a less casual look*

Strappy Dresses

Best paired with your favorite statement necklace, wedges/sandals – it’s completely yours to dress up or down making it versatile and a great piece for summer

Bold Printed Pieces

Best paired with a simple statement accessory such as a large clutch or subtle jewelry

Two Piece Sets

Best paired with booties/wedges, arm cuff, or statement accessory

T-strap Metallic Sandals

Can be paired with literally anything! These sandals are basic, yet add just the right amount of flare to any outfit

Statement Earrings

Can be paired with anything to create a unique outfit - HOT TREND this  summer!

Arm Cuffs

Be best paired with strappy tanks or dresses that show off your arms

Colors to lookout for: 

If you’re ballin’ on a budget like most college students, be sure to check out places like Forever 21, Urban Outfitters, or Target for dupes of high-end merchandise and, of course, always be on the lookout for sales! Flash Sale Sites such as RueLaLa and HauteLook always have designer pieces at a fraction of the cost. 

XOX & LP,

Kaitlyn 

Summertime Sadness: Coping with Missing Your Sorority Sisters

Let’s face it, summer is definitely the best time of the year! However, like everything else, it has a few downsides like awkward tan lines, the bratty children you’re babysitting, and the humidity that makes your hair frizz. The worst part of summer is being separated from all of you sisters.  It’s so hard to go from seeing sisters every day in the fall, spring, and winter to not seeing everyone all summer long.  Here are some tips to staying in touch with all of your favorite girls during the summer season!

1.       Plan a road trip. There’s nothing like a little bit of summer adventure! If you have a free couple of days, search around to see if there are any fairs or attractions nearby sisters and take a trip to visit them and attend. You can also look to see if there are any beaches, lakes, or rivers around to hang out at if the weather is nice. Maybe even hit the mall or find an outdoor mall to check out.

Campus Rep, Kelsey, and her chapter's beach day!

Campus Rep, Kelsey, and some of her sisters at Disney!

Campus Rep, Ashley, and some sisters at the beach!

2.       Send a care-package. I bought some little souvenirs for my Little and made a bunch of different cards to send to her since she’s at an internship three states away. You can even hit up the dollar store and find some cute little things or use your crafty side to make some cute little gifts that you can send. The point is just to show that you’re still thinking of them. However, make sure you don’t leave your gifts sitting in your room like I did! (sorry Little, you’ll get your care package soon, I promise!) This is also a really great tip to surprise a sister who is abroad for the summer!

Box of Sunshine Idea: get a box and fill it with all yellow objects.

3.       Send a tweet or post on their Facebook wall. I love when I get a notification that one of my sisters tweeted at me or posted on my wall. It's even better when it's a funny picture or something that reminds me of an inside joke we have between us.

4.       Start up a book club. Last summer, one of our alumni contacted our chapter to see if we would be interested in setting up a book swap. Since it's summer, you might have more time to lay out and read a good book. Once you’ve finished it, why not send it on to a sister who you might think will like it too? 

5.       Plan a crafting night. Find a sister who lives somewhere that's a centralized location and host a sleepover and crafting night. Big/Little season is right around the corner and crafting with your sisters is always a win. Add some pizza and a few movies like Bridesmaids or Mean Girls, and you’re golden! Bonus: find a sister or two to road-trip there with.

6.       Sports! Find out if there is a major or minor league team near you. Many ticket offices have a group discount and a night at the ballpark is never a bad time. Being from Michigan, I know that Comerica Park (Home of the Detroit Tigers) has a lot of fun promotional nights, and they have fireworks after every night game on the weekend! Though the NFL season hasn't started yet, many cities have arena football leagues. The games are just as fun, but without the big ticket prices!

It’s also really important to remember that sisters are always only one text, one facetime, or one call away and it’s only a little over a month until it’s time to head back to school where you’ll be surrounded by your sisters again! So make the most of your summer and don't be afraid to take some personal you time to relax! Leave a comment below and let us know what you've done with sisters over the summer.

Xoxo

-Lucie